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Friday, December 11

Dear Bladder,

What happened to us? We used to have a great relationship, or at least one that I understood. But lately you’ve become, well…a bit needy. Calling me all the time, sometimes for absolutely no reason at all and often multiple times an hour. Today was the last straw my friend. I SPECIFICALLY did not stop to get my normal Starbucks on the way to the dog park so that I wouldn’t have to deal with you, and what happened? The Port-a-John. Now this is where I draw the line. Even without being pregnant that thing is an assault on all my senses. So, snap out of it, you are being pushed around by a baby the size of an apple seed!!

Port-a-John-aphobe,

Kimiko

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